Everybody Loves Yamato
by JC Maxwell-Yuy
Summary: It seems as if everybody loves Ishida Yamato. But when the love cologne Mummymon buys gets mixed up with poor Yama-kun's things just before a lunch date with the others, what chaos will enthuse? Warning: Yaoi


Everybody Loves Yamato

(who doesn't?)

By: JC Maxwell-Yuy

________________________________________________________________________ 

JC: Ohayo!

Solo: Why is all your fanfiction Yamato centric?

Yamato: Can't you 'torture' someone else… like Daisuke? He deserves it.

Daisuke: HEY! 

JC: Be quiet, or I'll write another Yamasuke fic.

Yamato: NO! NO! ANYTHING BUT THAT!

Daisuke: I wouldn't mind.

JC:…

Solo: JC does NOT own Digimon Adventure 02, never will.

________________________________________________________________________ 

It was an average day in Tokyo… except for the fact that Archnemon and Mummymon were in the real world that day. 

"What's the point of working and earning money if we don't get to spend it?" Archnemon complained. "What I need is another pair of sandals!"

"Archnemon, shouldn't we…?" Mummymon asked but she whacked him upside the head with her binoculars, lord knows where she keeps those.

"Shut up! I want those sandals, and maybe a new purse while I'm here… and there's this Chinese restaurant I'm dying to go to! They say that it has the more flies around there than any other place in the city!" 

"While we're eating, you can…" Mummymon puckered up, but she whacked him silly with the binoculars again, leaving several big lumps on his head.

"You make me sick!" and the spider-woman stomped into a nearby thrift shop to give her credit cards a good workout.

'Oh, if only she could see we were meant to be together!' Mummymon brooded over his constant problem. A nearby sign in a store window caught his only visible eye.

'Love Cologne! CHEAP! IT REALLY WORKS!' the sign declared.

Mummymon, having tried every other way to seduce Archnemon, and never spending much of his paycheck, went in and bought some of the 'Love Cologne™'. He put some on and waited for the woman to finish shopping. 

"What is that horrible smell? It's making me sick! Come on Mummymon, we're going back to the Digital World! I need to test out this new bubble-bath-for-evil-villains™!" she turned her nose up and walked away.

"Stupid! Why didn't it work?" Mummymon stared at the bottle, finally noticing the fine print™. 

_'This product will only work on humans. It will NOT work on stupid mummies that are trying to seduce spider women.'_

"Stupid cologne!" Mummymon got up and followed Archnemon, in doing so, he brushed past a certain blonde bishounen, also shopping in the area, not noticing that the cologne bottle fell out of his pocket and into the blonde's shopping bag. 

Yamato Ishida was one happy guy. Today, he had a lunch date with his one and only, Taichi… and the rest of the chosen children.

"Oh shit! I have only one hour to get ready!" the boy moaned when he looked at his watch. He quickly finished selecting some fish and vegetables and hurried home.

When he got back to the apartment, the fish and veggies went into the fridge, then he quickly stripped and showered. (sorry, I promise to write a VERY revealing shower scene in the future, but for now, use your imaginations) After writing his love's name in the bathroom mirror five times, he put on that sleeveless black shirt Taichi liked, and threw on some jeans. He then went over to the grocery bags and began putting away the remaining items. 

"That's funny, I don't remember buying cologne." He muttered when the small bottle filled with gold liquid fell out of the sack. Yamato opened it and sniffed.

"Nice, I hope Taichi will like it." 

After finishing putting the groceries away, he went to the bathroom and re-gelled his hair. He dabbed some of the cologne on and waited.

Soon the doorbell rang, and it was Taichi, with the rest of the gang. After exchanging a quick kiss, and some jealous looks from Sora, they went off to some Italian place Jyou and Koushiro had discovered. During the walk there…

'I wonder why everyone's staring at me so weirdly…' Yamato stuffed his hands in his pockets uncomfortably when he felt the hot gaze of his friends burning into him. Even Taichi seemed to be looking at him hard. The brown-haired boy had his hand wrapped tightly around his waist, and Koushiro and Sora had begun drooling.

"Ah, Yamato!" Jun said surprised when he walked into the restaurant.

"Jun… It's so nice… to see you." Yamato stammered. He did NOT want to see her at this moment… ' But wait a second, she sounds quite sane.'

"I'm so glad you all came. You wouldn't believe how slow it was this morning." Jun grabbed a fistful of menus and led the kids to their seats.

"You work here?" Yamato asked, surprised.

"Yeah, for a while. I needed some extra cash, and Daisuke sort of told me this was a good place to start. My boyfriend encouraged me to get this job as well." Jun passed the menus out. "I'll be back to take orders." She left.

"Is it just me, or is she more stable?" Yamato wondered. "Daisuke, why didn't you tell me that your sister finally found a boyfriend?"

"Because…" Daisuke's eyes had an odd gleam in it. " I was too busy staring at you." 

"What?" Yamato's jaw dropped.

"Oh Yamato… dump Taichi and be mine!" Sora sidled up next to him and kissed him.

"Sora, what are you…?" the blonde inched away, right into Taichi.

"You know koi, you are looking delicious right now…" Taichi had on a feral grin that said 'I WANT YOU NOW!' written… or drooled, all over it.

"Uh… Taichi… " Yamato backed away.

"Yama-chan. Did I ever tell you how big a fan I am?" Miyako gushed.

"Miyako… what next?" the boy cringed when Iori and Koushiro began eyeing him, lust in their beady eyes.

"Yama-chan. Let us be one with my hentai-mind!" Koushiro declared.

"Yamato-kun. Let's show them that age doesn't matter!" Iori pushed Koushiro aside, in doing so, knocking over a glass of water into Jyou's lap.

"I … I'll be back Yama-koi!" Jyou headed toward the bathroom. 

"Oh Yamato…" Hikari's eyes gleamed with that unearthly light. "I want you!"

"Oni'chan… I want you right now!" Takeru glomped his brother. "Let's show the world what happens when two HOT blondes strut their stuff!"

"Takeru!" Yamato pried his brother off him. "That is just wrong!"

"I know. Let's go Yamato!" Sora latched on to Yamato's right arm.

"Hey! Let go of him, you hussy!" Taichi grabbed the other arm.

"Oni'chan!" Takeru glomped the upper part of his body.

"Mine!" Koushiro grabbed the… ahem lower, unmentionable places, which are mentioned quite often.

"Koushiro! Cut that out!" Yamato gasped, shocked that the younger boy had just groped him.

"Oh Yamato…" Hikari's eyes were glowing with that light, scaring the hell out of him. She buttered some bread and tried to feed him… from across the table. "I won't bite… much."

"I am so glad Mimi isn't here." Yamato mumbled to himself as he tried to get Koushiro and Takeru off him, which was hard to do since Taichi and Sora were holding both his arms, pulling him in two different directions.

Suddenly, Mimi burst in through the door with Michael and Ken. 

"HI! I thought I'd drop by and Ken said you guys would be here and…" she trailed off when she saw what the others were doing. A feral gleam™ lit up on her face and she pounced on Yamato, joining the already insane frenzy™. 

"Uh… let's go!" Ken and Michael also joined in. 

"Stop! Leggo! Koushiro! STOP THAT! TAICHIIIII!!!" Yamato screamed as everyone tried to get a piece of him. 

"Oh MY GOD!" Jun screamed when she returned to take orders. "Have you people gone MAD? Daisuke! YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO GROPE THE ROCK STAR!" 

"Mmm… Yamato… what is it about you that makes me… " Daisuke trailed off as he tried to steal a kiss.

"I can… write new songs for you… only for you…" Ken gasped as he shoved Daisuke aside.

"Somebody HELP!" Yamato desperately tried to grab a hold of something to pull himself away… but only succeeded in grabbing…

"Oh! Yama-chan! I knew you liked me!" Iori grabbed Yamato's outstretched hand and nuzzled it. Yamato paled, for he had groped Iori.

"Yamato is MINE!" Mimi screamed.

"No, he's MINE!" Sora screeched.

"MINE!" Ken yelled.

"NO! I LOVE HIM!" Takeru and Daisuke tried to wrench Iori away from Yamato.

"WILL ALL OF YOU STOP THAT?!" Jun screamed, but it had no effect. 

"I'm back! Did you miss me?!" Jyou returned and had a hard time getting into the frenzy.

"Please! Stop! TAICHI!" Yamato screamed. "This is embarrassing! Onegai! STOP! KOUSHIRO! STOP!" the blonde thrashed and finally managed to pull free when his foot connected with Daisuke's face. 

"He footmarked™ my face!" Daisuke sighed happily.

Unfortunately for Daisuke, Yamato's escape caused the whole bunch of kids to herd after him, leaving many footprints-that-herding-kids-make™ all over his face. 

"Itai…" 

Jun shook her head. 'Why am I surrounded with crazy people?' she shrugged, but put a call into the cops to come and take the evil stalker™ that was following her away. 

Yamato ran as fast as he could down the street. Behind him, a large cloud of dust told him everyone else was still following him. Although he wouldn't mind too much if Taichi caught him, or Michael, who was looking hot in his tight jeans and polo shirt, which was unbuttoned, showing off his chest. 

'Come to think of it, Ken is hot! Still, I can't let them all catch me!' he gasped as he ducked into a nearby store, and waited until the herd of chosen children stampeded past. 

"Excuse me, but aren't you…?" Someone asked. Yamato didn't even turn around and ran out of the store screaming.

"Boy, he's acting odd." The person wearing a red headband with trailing ends that danced under blonde hair. For JC Maxwell-Yuy's standards (yes, my self-insertion™), Yamato was doing pretty good, for no one would have survived running THAT long; not even 'perfect soldier'.

Now Yamato was at his wits end. He had no idea what he was going to do. When he was sure that the rest of the children had ran off, he made a break for his apartment. 

"I… have to lock the door!" Yamato gasped when he got to the door, the herd of chosen children and then some just a few feet behind him. Unfortunately, halfway home they had spotted him and gave chase, so now he was trapped, with twenty or so people banging on the door. 

"YAMA-CHAN! LET ME IN! IT IS I, YOUR TRUE LOVE!" everyone was screaming outside.

"Why are they??? … Of course, the cologne!" Yamato smacked his head when he realized what was happening. Quickly he scanned the bottle and found he had to take a fifteen minute shower to get rid of the smell/spell. 

"First, wash your hair three times, then scrub your unmentionables, which are mentioned quite often, and do the happy, happy monkey dance while holding a bottle of shampoo in your right hand, and a bar of soap in your left hand." He read, and sweatdropped. 

"YAMATO!" a voice came from outside.

The bearer of Friendship looked outside the balcony window and saw Daisuke scaling the building. Mimi and Michael were approaching in a helicopter, and Miyako had bribed the window washer and was rising on the scaffolding-that-people-bribe-window-washers-to-use-when-they-are-after-Yamato-Ishida™.

Having no choice, Yamato dashed into the bathroom. He quickly pulled his shirt off, and chucked off his pants and silk-boxers-that-turn-Taichi-on™. With the bathroom door locked and barricaded with a large stack of newspapers that his father had in there, he yanked back the shower curtain to reveal…

"TAICHI!" Yamato screamed when he saw his boyfriend standing in the shower, naked and a big smile on his face.

"Hello koi." Taichi smirked, the feral gleam still in his eyes, but it seemed to have faded some. 

"How did you get in here?" the blonde gawked, a look of panic washing over his face. 

"Easy. You gave me a key, remember?" Taichi pulled Yamato into the shower. "I just got here before you, and everyone else. Now, about that shower…" he leaned over and brushed his lips across Yamato's nape.

"Shower??? You know about the cologne?" Yamato pulled free from Taichi.

"Well, when I got here, I saw the bottle, and… I thought," the brown-haired boy said, and turned the water on. "We could have some fun." 

"Taichi, you are one BIG hentai." Yamato grumbled.

"I love you too babe." Taichi laughed and pulled his koi under the hot spray of water.

After he had washed his hair three times, scrubbed his unmentionables, which are mentioned quite often, and did a happy, happy monkey dance while holding a bottle of shampoo in his right hand and a bar of soap in his left hand. All the time he was doing this, Taichi's eyes slowly returned to normal.

"What happened?" Taichi shook his head, sending droplets of water everywhere. "And whoa! Koi, when did you decide to let me in your 'private shower time'?" 

"Since you came… or will, anyway." Yamato traced his finger across Taichi's tightly muscled chest.

"Babe, you are one, big hentai." Taichi kissed his koibito. 

"Speak for yourself." Yamato sighed. 'I'm just glad everything's normal again.'

Meanwhile, the crowd outside the Ishida apartment door had dispersed. Miyako had beaten up the window washer and had gotten her money back. Daisuke met up with Takeru and Ken; and the three boys went off to some fair. Mimi and Michael returned to the US of A; leaving Jyou and Koushiro to sort things out between them.

Later, after learning about the incident, Iori went to the love potion store and trashed it with his kendo moves. He didn't want a repeat of the incident, nor did he want another like it. Koushiro apologized to Yamato and ran off happily with Jyou, whose brother, unfortunately, is now Jun Motomiya's newest target. 

"I'm sorry. No hard feelings? Me too. Bye." Sora hung up, after apologizing to Yamato for kissing him. 

'I hope we never have to go through that again…' she stared at a picture of all of them, in which Taichi had his arm wrapped around her waist. 'But Taichi, I really hope you can forgive me. I know we didn't have anything, but just forgive me this once…'

The phone rang, and the answering machine picked up. 

"Sora, its Taichi. No hard feelings?"

Sora picked the phone up. "No hard feelings." 

________________________________________________________________________ 

JC: So, do you people want more?

Chibimon: More! More! More!

JC: I hope you all don't mind, but I want to try to turn Sora in to a better person, and totally diss the 02 ending.

Daisuke: Please, do not write another fic like this, I am begging you.

JC: That's up to the masses. Do you guys want another 'Everybody Loves' fic? If you have recommendations for which character, I'll be glad to take it into consideration… heck, I just might do all the kids… whadda ya think of that?

Daisuke: RRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!


End file.
